Eric is my very oldest friend…..no one that i currently pal around with has known me as long, and once upon a VERY long time ago we were even high school sweethearts! (Shudder) He is like a brother to me and we have been through every imaginable hell together over all these long years. I can’t even think of my life without him in it, and never more than a day or two passes that we are not cackling at each other over the miles.

Being as i am a weepy sentimental nutcake lately, the comment he left on my last post really got me, and i have to re-print it because it is beautiful and it made my heart swell up. So here is what my beloved Darling of Hecate had to say…..

“So one of the indicators that we are all worm food in waiting has been Amanda’s hysdirectomy. In our little circle of heathens we all fancy ourselves displaced fairy children, or mythplaced fables trying desperately to survive in the mundy world. I accept that we will all rot in the end and that these bodies are but a classroom for the soul. Or more correctly a cocoon. During our mortal tenure on this world we learn that those dramas that afflict this world play themselves out in the lines on our faces,the tumors in our guts, and the breaking of our hearts. Life is the slow hammering of the body until that rattle that indicates that something has flown free of the mortal coil. I have observed the white hairs reproducing themselves in my beard like an early frost before a long winter. So old Goblin Kings must come to terms that they are the next Winter King. We see Faery Queens meet the Crone at the crossroads and though they have yet to switch roles they can take a moment to shake hands and get to know one another. Here in our mere 30s we can begin to sense that though we have most of our lives still ahead of us it is indeed finite. The key to accepting this is curiosity and wonder. One of the greatest frustrations at the moment of demise is regret for all those things we deprived ourselves of. So we will weave wonder with Amanda’s crafty little fingers and I will grow life with my green fingers Charlie will paint and bless our hands in henna so that we may weave ever stronger enchantments. Like the legion of Amanda made dolls that guard our home. (yes, they walk around at night and terrorize Goliath, the cat and the poodle are comfortably well adjusted to their company) In the end it is the beauty you create that you take to the next world. The plants I grow will be the forest we will stroll through. the stories Charlie writes will be myths we will tell our people there. Amanda’s creations will populate and protect us in our Arcadian realm. So in the end if you are magical are you creating enough to beauty to ensure your comfort in the next world?”

Hormones, wow. They make one weepy and fragile and stupidly introspective. Hope mine even out soon as healing progresses and i work my way through this little mini-menopause . Meanwhile, once again , the Cocteau Twins can say how i feel today better than i can myself. Enjoy. The song is lovely, the video is a treat, so please do click away!
Evangeline

Sorrow for letting someone else define you
Know who you are at every age
What impression am I making?
I see me as other people see me

There is no going back
I can’t stop feeling now
I am not the same, I’m growing up again
I am not the same
I’m growing up again
There’s no going back I can’t stop feeling now

I had to fantasize
I was a princess, Mum and Dad were Queen and King
I ought to have what feeling?
I see me as other people see me

There is no going back
I can’t stop feeling now
I am not the same, I’m growing up again
I am not the same
I’m growing up again
There’s no going back I can’t stop feeling now

Feeling now

There is no going back, and
I can’t stop feeling now
I am not the same, I’m growing up again
I am not the same
I’m growing up again
There’s no going back I can’t stop feeling now

I had to fantasize
Just to survive
I was a famous artist
Everybody took me seriously

Even those who did
Never understood me
I had to fantasize
Just to survive

hello all. Just wanted to post a quick note to thak everyone for the wonderful healing wishes and kind thoughts. Knowing you’re out there makes it so much better.

Thus far recovery hasn’t been too terrible, thanks to vicodin, my sweet sweet hub, and lots of rest. Who knew that walking from room to room could be so exhausting!  It annoying because i long to just be back to normal, but  if i push myself it will only take longer to heal. So, no dancing in faerie rings for the pixie housewife just yet.  Just lots of floating around on the vicodin-cloud for now

alas, i need to go and lay back down…sitting for very long is mighty uncomfy!  I will be on and off, and i will try to catch up on emails as best i can. Until then, please know that i love you guys so much, and appreciate every single one of you more than i can say.

xoxoxoxo

I wanted to stop in and let everyone know that Amanda has made it through her surgery without issue, and is recovering nicely.  She is already bored of the hospital and wants to come home.

There is lots to be done before she comes home tomorrow I must run, but once she is doing better I am sure she will update everyone with all the details.

Thanks to everyone for all the support

–D

So, tomorrow is the day….i have to arrive at the hospital at 6am, and should hopefully be coming home by Saturday afternoon if all goes well. MY lovely hub will post tomorrow night to let everyone know that i am still among the living.

I am having the worst time concentrating and focusing on getting anything much done today. Packing is a joke…i find myself putting the most absurd things into my bag…what on earth will i possibly do with a glue stick and pair of scissors? Ridiculous! I have settled on the copy of Faerie Magazine that i have been hoarding, my ipod, cell phone and a dark chocolate with crystallized ginger Chocolove bar. I have my grandma’s aqua chenille robe and pink fluffy slippers…

i have some new cute pink embroidered ‘jammies that i bought just for the occasion and all the other little necessaries. The nest room is tidy with fresh sheets sprayed down with rose linen water, and lots of books and other goodies to occupy me. I suppose i am ready.

Meanwhile i am wandering around my overgrown yard and being amazed at how lush and wonderful spring can be…

I will be so glad when this is all behind me…. and i really really want to say THANK YOU so much to you all for being so kind to me during this yucky time. I am sorry i have not emailed everyone personally the way i waned to, but really, do you REALLY want to hear more of my xanax fueled babbling? LOL! Please just know that i i am so grateful to all of you who read and support my creativity. Soon i will be back to the *MAKING* that i miss so much, and have lots more POSITIVE things to talk about! Until then, have a wonderful wonderful spring, my lovies!!!!

xoxoxo

I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when my fear is gone I will turn and face fear’s path, and only I will remain.

~Dune

So i am a mere four days from H day. I can’t even begin to express the way i feel. I keep trying to write about it, but i can’t even find the right words. I am trying to focus on how much better i will feel when it’s all done and i am healed.  It ain’t easy. And i imagine each passing day til friday will get increasingly harder. But i can do this.  I know i can.

FiFi is a nature girl, poking around around the flower beds, looking for interesting bugs, and always climbing trees to peek into bird’s nests….alas, falling from a tree can sometimes have a disastrous effect. Never climb trees when you are stricken with with spring fever, it can make one’s judgment alittle bit off, as FiFi can tell you from experience.

My contribution to the potluck is  the lovely eggs my little one dyed and decorated today, cherry turnovers and a big ol’  baked ham! They ham is still slow-cooking in the oven and will be done a bit later with some yummy potatoes, but here’s the other goodies!

I have never made turnovers before, and it is not exactly a “regional” recipe, but i saw the recipe in the latest issue of Martha Stewart Everyday Food and wanted to give it a try. It was actually pretty simple, and i think with practice i could make them turn out alot prettier…but for my first try, i am very pleased, and they are VERY tasty! Turnovers are universal treats, and i wanted this to be fun and low stress, so this recipe was perfect for today.

The eggs are the wonderful work of my little beastie! We only had freckled brown eggs, and i think it made the colors alot richer and prettier, and who can resist cute FRECKLES! Beastie had a great time making a mess! The eggs are definitely the crown jewel of the day!

To finish, we have rose tea! As pretty as this cuppa is, it’s not the real deal…. the rose tea we drink is a black tea blended with rose petals, and we get it from Harney and Sons…it is absolutely delightful with a spoonful of honey stirred in!

I hope everyone is having fun with the potluck and a grand friday! Big Bright Blessings for a wonderful spring to you all!

xoxo

At last, the source of the nests is revealed! I just caught her in the act!!!!

Notice she has a little birdie accomplice now….yesterday i found my home suddenly filled with delightful little birdlings flying in from Florida and they are getting along famously with the Faeries! I tried to gather the unruly things up, but it is very hard to get them to nest in one spot for long!

Spring is delightful inside the magical buttonbox bubble i have built around myself. Aside from my Very Serious Work of photographing faeries, i have been working on a dolly and making messes of one kind and another…

…And welcoming the Guardian of my nest-room, who has newly arrived all the way from the Canary Islands! Say hello to Anastasia, Queen of the Kingdom of Moths!

Busy busy busy being lazy and silly and finding beauty in every moment of the day! Feeling more blessed than i ever dreamed possible, and so full of love that i might pop. I hope you are all well and happy, and enjoying the blooms and birdies too!